Thesis Statements

 

Identify the weak thesis statement

1.  A)  I’m going to write about Darwin’s concerns with evolution in The Origin of the Species.
     B)  Darwin’s concern with survival of the fittest in The Origin of the Species leads him to neglect a potentially conflicting aspect of his theory of evolution-survival as a matter of interdependence.
A) is a weaker thesis statement because it just tells what the essay will be about.  There is no argument.

2.  A)  An important part of one’s college education is learning to better understand others’ points of view.
     B)  Although an important part of one’s college education is learning to better understand others’ points of view a persistent danger is that the students will simply be required to substitute the teacher’s answers for the ones they grew up uncritically believing.
A) is a weaker thesis statement because its just a fact.  There is nothing to argue, no questions can really be drawn from this statement.

3.  A)  By inventing terms, such as “loose fit” and “relaxed fit”, the jean industry has attempted to normalize, even glorify, its product for an older and fatter generation.
     B)  The jeans industry targets its advertisements to appeal to young adults.
B) is the weaker statement because it is boring in comparison to A).  A) has much more of an argumentative aspect to it.

4.  A)  Othello is a play about love and jealousy.
     B)  Although Othello appears to attack jealousy, it also supports the skepticism of the jealous characters over the naïvete of the lovers.
A) is weaker because its common knowledge. 

5.  A)  The songs of the punk rock group Minor Threat relate to the Feelings of individuals who dare to be different. Their songs are just composed of pure emotion. Pure emotion is very important in music, because it serves as a vehicle to convey the important message of individuality. Minor Threat’s songs are meaningful to me because I can identify with them.
     B)  The punk rock group Minor Threat uses emotional lyrics to appeal to their target audience, which considers itself individualistic and therefore the lyrics must convey a message of individuality.
A) is the weaker of the two statements because it is merely how the writer feels about the band.  There would be no way of proving or disproving someone’s “feeling” about an issue.

The thesis statement for my essay on the biography of Tim O’Brien will be the following:
What would he have become if he had not gone back home?  The answer to that is, he would still be a writer.  A writer of different things, but a writer still.  His novels would be about the trials and tribulations he would have gone through if he had decided not to go back home and enlist as he was order to do.  He may not have become a famous writer and have books that are frequented in classrooms, such as The Things They Carried, but he would still have become a writer.

http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/545/01/